Useless But At The Same Time We're Still Young

Wow.. I never get on here ha ha. I've been surprised with myself lately. I haven't gotten on the computer a lot, which is GREAT! Ha ha!

School is starting soon and can i just tell you that i am NOT excited in certain ways. One of them being that i am growing up! I don't wanna grow up! It seems like just yesterday i rode my first rollercoaster (which was years ago), or my dad was here being a dork-wad in the car or other unimportant things. It feels like time is going by way too fast and i have no time to enjoy being a teenger! Is that wrong?! I'm feelin it is!

I'm also not excited cause of homework. BLAH I hate homework so much. But hey who doesn't ha ha. Another reason i can give you is that i HATE annoying people and i really don't want to meet any more but i will so that's not something to look forward to. Sigh.. When will people realize they just need to shut up? (ha ha)

Anyways. So pretty much, this guy who i thought was my used to be best friend is now my good friend again. Which is good, but i have a hard time seeing things differently from before. He said sorry to me and i don't know i guess it's better now but it still feels weird being around him or talking to him.

Sigh it's just so sad that people have such a hard time getting over things, including myself. It's just one of those depressing things in life, but i can't help but wonder that if we really tried hard enough (hard enough to pass the point of physical pain from it possibly) that we COULD do it. We see people everyday and hear them and listen to them talk about how EASY is it to get over things, yet they never tell us the pain and how much self motivation it really takes to do it. They say it's easier said than done and that's obvious but never details. I wish they could give us details sometimes so it wouldn't be so hard and we'd know what to do in each situation, but if it was the same for everyone life would be so beyond black and white.

His story of why he did what he did and does what he does is just unspeakably sad. I can't believe it. I cried over someone else's love story. How pathetic ha ha. But in all seriousness, why did she do what she did? Why do people do that? Why do they bring someone up and tear them down like it was as easy as ripping a piece of paper? It's just so heart breaking to think about it. Yeah i know, "don't think about it then" right? Ha well if you know me you'd know i have a really hard time 'not thinking' about things i can't figure out. Maybe that's why i see different sides to everything no matter how stupid or sad. But i can't even see it in her perspective. At all. I can't even IMAGINE what she could've been thinking when she tore him down like that! It bugs me SO bad! She showed interest, she flirted like she really liked him and even in a way explained why she liked him. But out of no where she just doesn't like him anymore because she doesn't like how he dates? How he does things? How he is? Because she doesn't want a serious relationship? How is that? Why is such a person who claims to be an open person do that? And then go be a hypocrite and find someone else to be serious with? I don't understand that at all. Maybe i never will. I guess i can see it sometimes if i imagined myself doing that, but reading what he wrote just makes what i 'thought' completely fall out of place.

Bah i'm just blabbing on again and i'll just stop right about now but the fact is: Life sucks, don't sit and ignore, COPE.

Love, Mia